An organ so strong yet so fragile.

It moves not just oxygen into me,

but also carries all my pain .

It pumps life into me

but the valves fail to keep the feelings out.

 

It beats faster every time I see you.

Almost fighting to be let out so it can touch you.

So I can touch you.

But it never forgets.

It did not forget how it welcomed your warmth.

How you made it smile every time you laughed.

It did not forget all the things you made it feel

And how you left it broken in a single moment.

A single moment that changed the way it feels.

A single moment that left it cold.

A single moment that made stopped me from letting anyone else  in.

It never forgets.

I never forget.

 

And it still gets excited the most when it feels anything close to warmth

Then turns cold again to protect it from itself.

To protect me from myself.

 

But sometimes I can ignore it.

I silence its frustrations every time I think about you.

When I think about what we once were and could have been.

Sometimes I leave it behind when I want to feel anything that doesn’t concern it.

To feel my body shake and my insides twirl, and it remaining unmoved.

 

Sometimes I hate it.

I hate how it forces me to feel.

I hate how it makes me remember.

I hate how I can’t really leave it.

Because I carry it with me,

Everywhere.

I am it and it is me.